The fact is that some of us cannot preserve our dignity and well-being if we remain connected to one or both of our parents. We just can't. This applies to siblings as well. This is not to say that we don’t do our best to heal and preserve those relationships, but sometimes it's simply not possible and it's not healthy to continue. Unfortunately, many who have made the brave, necessary decision to disconnect are met with a shaming, shunning response from others. It is one of the most destructive and imprisoning guilt trips of all time “But she’s your mother”, “But he’s your brother”, “They did their best”, “You owe them your life” etc. This has to stop. You can be sure that if someone is considering disconnecting from members of their family of origin, there must be very legitimate reasons for doing so. Even if they did their best, that doesn’t mean we have to stay in contact with them. Some wounds cut too deep. Some bridges have been permanently burnt. Some people do not change. Let’s get this straight- you are not a bad person if you choose to say good bye to abusive family members. You have every right to preserve your emotional integrity. Our responsibility to those who abuse us cannot be greater than our responsibility to ourselves. - Jeff Brown