Inquiry is the bridge...

When valued personal relationships go silent, trouble often follows. I'm not talking about productive "time-outs" that are clearly expressed - I am talking about silence that is reactive, or an attempt to do harm. This kind of silence ensures that the connection will not find its way back to health. Because silenece fosters confusion, projections, and worst of all, assumptions about what the other is feeling or thinking. And assumption doesn't get us anywhere good. Inquiry does. Assumptions ensure that the wall will only get thicker, until there is no way to reconnect. Whatever you do, even if you are justifiably angry, try to keep the door to inquiry open. You may not be ready to process the experience, but allow for the possibility that you one day will. Because valued connections are hard to find in this crazy world. Anger doesn't have to be the end of the story. Sometimes it's the portal to a closer connection. Sometimes, it's the way through to great learning. Inquiry is the bridge. - Jeff Brown, Hearticulations.