It’s a good idea to say nothing at all during contractions. In between contractions: •“You are doing great!” •“Are you comfortable? Do you want to get into the tub?” You should have a nice warm birth tub ready to go. •“Are you thirsty? Would you like water, juice, or tea?” You should have all of her favorite drinks on hand, ready to go. •“Are you hungry? Would you like an orange, or some pineapple or an apple slice?” You should have all of her favorite fruits and (healthy) snacks on hand. Ideally plant foods. (If you are surrounded by professionals who insist on following medieval practices like forced starvation, just do the best you can while keeping a peaceful atmosphere.) •“Do you want to change positions, walk around, or squat? We have the birth ball, the birth stool, or more pillows.” You should have all those things and more on hand. •“Do you want some different music? How is the volume?” You should have all of her favorite music ready to go. •“Do you want some essential oils?” You should have all of her favorite oils on hand, ready to go. •“Do you want a massage? Which muscles are sore?” You should know how to massage her. •“Do you want me, or anyone else in this room to leave?” Kick out anyone she doesn’t want in the room, including yourself if need be. •“Do you want me to lock the door so no one else comes in?” •“Do you want me to dim the lighting?” You should have several options for lighting control ready to go. •“I love you.” •“You are so beautiful.” •“You will see your baby soon!” Keep in mind, she may suddenly despise with vitriol everything and everyone she’s loved for the previous 9 months. Including you. This is normal. Expect it and sympathize accordingly. After reading this.. I realized...I did my son and his father a good deed and none to me.. but I will overcome the hurt and just move on... I love myself and my son.. that is enough.