Tuesday, April 30, 2019

I am enough.

This is my current state of mind regarding my 6-year old. When will I stop having to remind her to flush the the toilet, wash her hands, clean up her toys, tidy up after herself, whine about screentime, say thank you & & goodbye, try to control her stadium-level voice, be mindful of staying on task, stay in her chair during meals, not run around like a buffalo, listen and follow trough when I'm addressing her before my voice gets raw, etc...
I'm tired, always busy, vulnerable, hungry, and exhausted.. She's amazing and smart and can be stunningly sweet, but now that I'm a new mom of more then one, it seems like a bunch of things/habits that I have seemingly inadequately reinforced or instilled discipline with (especially listening and screentime and tidying) are kind of making me feel a sense of mom guilt? I'm wary of other moms judging me, too. Moms that don't know me. It's just a phase, right? It has flared up since her sibling arrived, but maybe it just bothers me more. What can I do to patch up. This keeps me up at night. No, not really, the baby does. 😅 Thoughts while up pumping. - Ruby T

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